We have all see it, you follow someone and as soon as you do an auto generated direct message is sent to your inbox on Twitter from them. I personally don’t like canned auto direct messages but that’s my preference. You can debate if auto generated direct messages are good or bad and maybe they are a good thing if you are getting hundreds of new followers a day but I wanted to address another important part of direct messages.

I consider the first direct message sent to someone after they follow you the very most important message you can send, it’s almost like a first impression. These messages should not be focused on asking your new follower to do something (go to my blog, download my eBook, click on my affiliate link, etc), remember this person just followed you and you could leave a very bad taste in their mouth.

Your first message to your new follower should be about them and them only. You should thank them for following you and let them know you appreciate them. Ask not what your followers can do for you but what you can do for your followers! If you take the time to make a good introduction you will build a better relationship with that person.

We have plenty of time after we build a relationship with a person to send another direct message or @ reply tweet with a link to our blog, website, etc. After a relationship has been established and trust is built they will be more likely to click the link then, rather than having it shoved in their face the first time we make contact with them.

We must remember that the people following us are real people and they have real feelings and should be treated with respect. It has also been said if you help enough people get what they want then you will also get the things you want. I am a strong believer in paying things forward, how about you?

I think a lot of us have seen the article post titled “Eight reasons why I’ll unfollow you on Twitter” and I agree with them. I have set some guidelines for myself to follow when using Twitter. These guidelines didn’t come to me when I started using Twitter they were already things I did but applied when I started using the program. These are my guidelines; you don’t have to follow them. These are my thoughts, you don’t have to agree or accept them for yourself.

1. Be polite! My mama always taught me to say please and thank you. There is no reason to be rude to anyone. Try to reply to every DM (personal DM not auto response DM) and acknowledge others when they tweet something to you. You never know when being kind will make that persons day better.

2. Don’t spam. Spam was never good in a can, email or on Twitter. Don’t spam junk links constantly or those silly “Get 16K followers in 90 days”. I promise you that if you are an interesting person with good things to say and you treat everyone with respect the followers will come.

3. Think of others first. Re-Tweet to help others and someone else will pay it forward. If you have a Tweet pal that posts a good video or article then help them, I think we deprive people of very “Tweet Worthy” material by just thinking of ourselves.

4. Don’t auto follow or auto direct message. This is a SOCIAL network, be social. Use the program the way it was intended, sure it will take more time but think what Twitter would be like if we all put it on autopilot. Life is not meant to be lived this way.

5. Don’t beg. If you whine to get people to click your links in tweets you look needy and pathetic. If you post tweets that say something like “Please help me, I need 8 more followers to reach 900” is that really adding any value to the people reading it? People like people that are confident.

6. Follow those that follow you back unless they give you reason to un-follow or they are not a fit for you. I have had a mixture of people that have followed me in my short time on Twitter so far and I have followed most of them because they have similar interests. I have not followed the people promoting porn, adult related material or ones that you can’t really tell what they are talking about.

7. If you don’t have anything good to say, don’t say anything at all. I personally don’t go on Twitter to fuss about things. I may post from time to time that I am not happy with my computer or the web is running slow or something to that but I try to make a joke about it or laugh. If you come on to just tweet and blast everything then you are wasting your energy and the time of others that are reading it. If you are just a “hater” and you look at twitter as the next place to start a fight then you are barking up the wrong tree, you won’t get many fans.

8. Don’t self promote just to feed your massive “Twego” (Twitter Ego) I think it’s ok to tell people what you do, post articles you have written and even post links to your products and services. What I think is not ok is to think you are the only one here with something valuable to offer and have the mindset that everyone should bow down to you. Let me break it down “Southern Style”…We all put our britches on the same way, one leg at a time. I think we can learn from each other and the day I stop learning is the day I need to move to a deserted island by myself.

9. Don’t have a 2 hour personal conversation in tweets. You are abusing the program and what it was designed for. If you want to chat go to Yahoo or MSN. I found some local people in my area and I even had things in common with them, I was excited till I followed them and realized they used twitter to talk to their friend and that was mostly it! I unfollowed quickly because I didn’t care about who they thought was cute, what time they planned to get together on Friday night, etc. More than half of the things I had no idea what they were talking about. I was useless chatter with no value what so ever.

10. Have fun! Yes I said fun, it’s easy to get in a rut with anything if you do it long enough and then next thing you know it has become routine and the fun is gone. Mix things up, don’t be afraid to step outside the box. Make people wonder what you will do next. Practice random acts of kindness. I feel that if you enjoy what you are doing you will do it better and others will also feed from this.